A little over a week ago, we covered the perils of perfection and underachievement. I
shared a personal testimony – actually two of them. One testimony detailed a
moment of communicative ineptness, while the other briefly described an
instance of communicative prowess. During said moment of glory, I did not
adhere to perfectionism and overachievement, nor perfectionism and
underachievement – instead, I communicated in a simple, yet effective mode that
produced fruit. Next, we declared that between perfectionism and
overachievement, and perfectionism and underachievement, neither is the lesser
of two evils. I then promised to take a break from mentioning the word
perfectionism, while taking a moment to focus my attention on the benefit of
imperfection within the context of everyday communication. But first, I’d like
to share some “uncommon cents”.

MY THREE SHINY CENTS

In my first blog post, I chronicled moments of discomfort we have faced when we are afraid to speak up. One of the remedies: You must know your stuff. Knowledge yields confidence. In turn, confidence stifles second-guessing behavior.

Moreover, there are three additional tips I’d like to share – tips to help reduce and ultimately eliminate the need to be perfect while engaged in everyday conversation.

1. PRACTICE


Engage in small talk with others. This is an exercise to condition introverts to engage in daily dialogue. Recall my brief introduction to the television representative. Sometimes one line such as Hello or Good morning is enough. Practice those one-liners with strangers or better yet, with the Very Important Person(s) in your world. Small talk practice empowers introverts to talk to anyone comfortably, thus alleviating the strain for unnecessary over the top perfect dialogue.

2. OPERATE AT YOUR OWN PACE

Some instances in life call for quick responses – occasionally we must think on our feet. But remember: all instances do not call for such swiftness. It is a known fact that introverts occasionally process information slowly, which allows us to think before we speak. The speed at which introverts will at times process data + our natural incline toward deep thinking, are some of our strengths. Yes, some people who work well under the gun, but often, when humans are rushed, our output is garbage. When engaged in dialogue, take your time. Process all information received, then disclose a quality response.

3. MARGINALIZATION OF VIP

There’s utility to mass net worth and vast social currency. However, we must remember that, despite one’s tax bracket or social status, we’re all the same. Pretty boys, gorgeous girls, celebrities, our peers — all of whom are under the umbrella of VIP — are normal flesh n’ blood human beings.

To overcome intimidation and see well beyond the glaring glow of VIPs, you must view them through a different lens. The lens in question involves marginalizing VIPs, but psychologically, to reduce their stature. There isn’t a potion or special tonic required. Instead, complete realization within your mind that all VIPs are normal, hence imperfect. Thus, believing all who are deemed perfect are imperfect helps lessen the need to speak flawlessly, say the right thing, and sound utterly rehearsed.

This brings me to my last point.

IMPERFECTION LEVELS THE PLAYING FIELD

Following Drew Brees’ disclosure of his coping mechanism, he referenced football as an imperfect game, played by imperfect people.

And, too, are our world and all people. I must say this admission of imperfection is in no way a free pass to fuck up without conscience.

Instead, it is an ideology to help stave off jitters while engaged in dialogue. For all that we do, we should aim to do our very best, though minus the pressure of perfection, because nobody is perfect, nor ever will be.

When communicating with others, I recommend using your signature voice. Indeed, how we talk to family, friends, managers, and others will slightly differ – but the two constants through it all are who you are and your voice — these are things you control. What each of us has to say and how we say it matters because everyone is a unique creation who brings newness and value to the table of life. Concerning your oral delivery — don’t over or underthink it.

STOP SECOND GUESSING YOURSELF. And lastly, never allow the need for perfection to alter or stifle your character, voice, and dialogue.

Best regards,

Joshua